Adventures with Dr. Lady Cutie Troublemaker

Does anyone get the reference in the title? Anyone at all? Bueller… Bueller…

So that’s a line from an old Pixies song. The Pixies broke up around 1990. Kim Deal and Black Francis just couldn’t deal with each other anymore. She grabbed her twin sister and a Throwing Muse and created The Breeders. Black Francis switched his name inside-out and became Frank Black. They made some good albums. Now the Pixies have reunited, and I’m holding tickets to the Nashville gig tomorrow night. I’m very skeptical. I hope they don’t suck.

Oh, and regarding work… They actually kept me very busy today at my minor. I’m very pleased about that. I don’t do bored well. Tonight, I was going to relax and take a bath, but the loudest location for listening to rave boy’s music is the bathroom, so I may just wait until the morning. Somehow a rushed shower in the morning with rave music isn’t as bad as when I’m supposed to be relaxing. I love my options. They are so very… REASONABLE… or not!

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I can’t believe how great this internship is. It’s a helluva lot of work, but I really feel like they do an excellent job of lining up great people who can provide us with exactly the kind of opportunities we’re looking for. I like all of my fellow co-interns, too. Not a bad one in the bunch. The other interns are all interesting people who seem to really have their heads on straight and know what they’re doing. This morning, I was in a lecture where I was actually a little behind everyone else, and honestly, I loved it. If I could choose, I’d prefer to be in a place where there are other people who are a little bit smarter than me. Now I’m not saying they are all smarter (heh heh), but they have had more training in the MMPI-2 than I have. That’s a really common personality measure that I learned a little bit about years ago in my personality assessment class but haven’t used much in practice. Anyhoo, I’m just feeling really lucky to be a part of it, even though I come home utterly exhausted most nights.

This weekend is pretty unplanned, which is actually a great thing. I’m going to try and sleep lots and clean. This place needs it… and I need it. I don’t really remember being this tired and overloaded in a long, long time. I think this is a year I will look back at as being highly significant in my life… Wait, didn’t I just have a few of those? Heh. Power living, people. Power living!

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So my computer, which I feel really isn’t that old, is apparently old according to all things geek, or is it nerd or dweeb? (Only geeks, nerds, and dweebs know the diff amongst themselves.) I try to use iTunes or Photoshop or Adobe Acrobat, and there is a great slowing down… Tap, tap, tap… lalala… hmmm… Ctrl + Alt + Delete… pause… dum-dee-dum-dum… I was trying to just deal, but to see Aaron attempt to use my computer and get pretty much MORE frustrated than me sealed it. I can’t deny it. I need an upgrade. And so I have Aaron on the case, since he knows hardware and I don’t. We’re looking into a way to keep all my accessories (keyboard, disc drives, monitor, accessories, and just replace the mother board and other stuff I can’t remember the name of right now. So he’s thinking he can get me moving at a reasonable rate for about $350.

OK, so that’s cool, but I’ve accepted it, AND THEN… Grrrrr… So I design a few spreadsheets for all this logging I have to do this year. In the past few days, I have learned that I need to fill out a detailed time log for my graduate program using one format, a different time log for my internship program, a time sheet for the school system, a time sheet for my minor rotation, and a mileage journal for the schools. (It was bad enough I had to go through the entire application process for both my major and minor rotations as if I DIDN’T ALREADY HAVE THE FRAKIN’ JOB!!!!)

OK, anyway, so I go to sync my newly created Excel time sheets with my Sony Clie, and it isn’t working! So I go to upgrade the software I use (Documents to Go), and it upgrades on my desktop, but apparently my PDA isn’t running the correct operating system to run the software. I’m in the 4’s. I need to be in the 5’s. I’m especially annoyed that upgrading the software made the old software go away. Gah! I search all over the Internet and learn that, in fact, "The Palm OS® operating systems require specific CPU and hardware features to operate. Because of this, the newer Palm OS® operating systems are unable to operate on handhelds that lack these required CPU and hardware features." In other words, I’m completely SOL. If I want to be able to use Excel spreadsheets on my Clie (something I’ve been doing for years), I’m going to have to buy a new PDA.

Why do they do this? It’s bad enough I have to pay about a million dollars a month for the two channels I want to watch on TV and another million just to get basic phone service and DSL Lite. It’s price gouging. Why can’t it stop? WHY?!!!

I’m considering buying this. It’s a good price. Although hell, I’ll probably have to get a new case to fit it and a new who-knows-what-else just to make it work the way it should in the first place. Did I mention that at my major rotation I have a cubicle but not computer or phone? I have a stapler. Today, I wrote a report on a Windows 1998 machine with no Internet access. Do these people not understand the manner to which I have become accustomed?! IU has completely spoiled me, and I’m really not interested in going backwards.

So in short, I’m basically looking at $525 just to keep me afloat technologically. It’s like teeth. I count on them to just be there. I should just have stuff that works. I don’t make enough for these upgrades. Three years isn’t long enough for stuff to be old. It just isn’t.

{Stomp, stomp, tantrum, pout, grrrrrrr…}

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I’ve been starting to think about where I should live next year. Take a look at this bit of bad news. Hmm… Not so sure I should stay. And oddly, as I blog, there is an ad on TV for something called Healthy Memphis. Hmm. Where do you think I should live? I might go back and take those Find Your Spot and Best Places tests again.

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I’m down in it here. I really am. I’m just in the door, and I’m drained. I didn’t turn on the stereo in the car on the way home. I think I need to take all the downtime I can get!

I spent the morning in an alternative school. I got to sit in on a History class that uses the Facing History curriculum. It’s so good, not filled with all the euphemisms and revisionist bullshit I learned in school. I loved it. This one kid in particular really made an impact on me. This teacher starts class by asking about their weekend. It was clear this one boy had a terrible weekend, and he didn’t want to talk about it. Once the main part of class got started, they were talking about slavery and the precipitating events leading up to the civil war. The teacher (and the curriculum) did such an amazing job of getting these kids to think about what happened. The boy got so engaged, and by the time he left the class, he was really excited about what they were learning.

Something about hearing these kids read from this textbook… I mean, they are the direct result of slavery. Their situations would be better if slavery hadn’t gone down the way it did. And the persistent generational poverty and continued lack of access over so many years has everything to do with why the kids in this classroom are at least two years behind educationally. This one girl read a section about how slaves counted as three-fifths of a person. Man… And she’s just exactly the result of that messed up system.

The social worker with me raised her hand and shared about how when she was a kid in Memphis in the 60’s, black people could only go to the zoo one day a week. I wonder how many white people living here then knew that. And I wonder how many who knew had some sort of rationalization that made that make any kind of sense.

After that school, I went to the high school where there was a murder almost two weeks ago. There’s so much to say about that few hours that it’s hard to know where to start. I guess mainly, I was amazed that this was a school like any other. I liked the teachers I met. I thought that the kids there were as well-behaved at lunch as any I’ve seen. The faculty found out this morning that the father of the child who was murdered is suing the school, but most faculty members wondered about his involvement in his son’s life prior to his death.

I think what was perhaps most emotional for me was that after speaking with a special education teacher for about 40 minutes, I found out that she was actually the first teacher who arrive on the scene. I can’t remember how much detail was in the papers, so I don’t want to say more to be doubly sure I’m not breaking any kind of confidentiality, but I was just amazed that this teacher was still around, focusing 100% on the children in her classroom. I don’t think she’s missed a single day since everything happened.

Being there in the building, knowing what happened in detail and where… it was really intense in some ways, really everyday in others. The hope is that we can do some things to help kids in general at the school after what happened. The sad thing is that many of the kids have already experience violent deaths in their short lives. Makes me feel lucky.

Phew. I need some downtime after days like this!

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