Adventures with Dr. Lady Cutie Troublemaker

The Silly Follow-Up…

By Abby at 7:29 pm on Wednesday, June 29, 2005

So you’ve read that sermon. Now here’s a different take on using the Bible to argue the legitimacy of homosexuality as a sexual orientation (!)…

A Letter to Dr. Laura

Dear Dr. Laura,

Thank you for doing so much to educate people regarding God’s law. I have learned a great deal from you, and I try to share that knowledge with as many people as I can. When someone tries to defend the homosexual lifestyle, for example, I simply remind him that Leviticus 18:22 clearly states it to be an abomination. End of debate. I do need some advice from you, however, regarding some of the specific laws and how to best follow them.

When I burn a bull on the altar as a sacrifice, I know it creates a pleasing odor for the Lord (Lev. 1:9). The problem is my neighbors. They claim the odor is not pleasing to them. How should I deal with this?

I would like to sell my daughter into slavery, as it suggests in Exodus 21:7. In this day and age, what do you think would be a fair price for her?

I know that I am allowed no contact with a woman while she is in her period of menstrual uncleanliness (Lev. 15:19-24). The problem is, how do I tell? I have tried asking, but most women take offense.

Lev. 25:44 states that I may buy slaves from the nations that are around us. A friend of mine claims that this applies to Mexicans but not Canadians. Can you clarify? I have a neighbor who insists on working on the Sabbath. Exodus 35:2 clearly states he should be put to death. Am I morally obligated to kill him myself?

A friend of mine feels that even though eating shellfish is an abomination (Lev. 10:10), it is a lesser abomination than homosexuality. I don’t agree. Can you settle this?

Lev. 20:20 states that I may not approach the altar of God if I have a defect in my sight. I have to admit that I wear reading glasses. Does my vision have to be 20/20, or is there some wiggle room here?

I know you have studied these things extensively, so I am confident you can help. Thank you again for reminding us that God’s word is eternal and unchanging.

—

Found some follow-up here.

Filed under: Politics/Social Justice — 5 Comments »

5 Comments

Comment by anthony

June 30, 2005 @ 6:12 am

Ya know I love this but what’s the point, it all comes back to an assumption for these people that their sky god tells us so. It’s like arguing travel times with somebody who accepts as a matter of fact that they can fly. Should we reason?

Comment by Abby

June 30, 2005 @ 7:44 am

I used to think not, but I’ve changed my tune. There are too many of “them” and too few of “us.” If you want to put your fingers in your ears and pretend that Bible-based Christians are going to just go away, you’re going to be sitting there alone for a long, long time while the world changes in the wrong direction.

Also, “them” are often good people, people I respect, friends. Yes, I want to have this conversation. I wouldn’t say “reason,” because I don’t think it’s about winning or losing, but the conversation? I think it’s important.

Comment by Peterson Toscano

June 30, 2005 @ 7:48 am

Have you ever been to Betty Bower’s site? She is America’s best Christian and with wonderful caustic wit, she slices, dices and make mince meat out of bigots.

Check out her BASH ministry. Baptists Are Saving Homosexuals.
http://bettybowers.com/bash.html

Comment by Peterson Toscano

June 30, 2005 @ 7:52 am

Wait, you have to hear this quote from Sister Betty’s site…

“Mrs. Bowers is leading these aesthetically-overloaded lost lambs back into the bosom of our Savior Jesus and is using a method as old as religion itself – coercive torture”

You can spend days here and do injury to yourself laughing.